he emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action statem

Here are a few simple things to keep in mind when the situation has deteriorated and the heat has been turned up.

The first is to breathe. That’s right. Here is the big secret you’ve been waiting for! Breathe! When human beings are faced with very tense situations we will often freeze up and forget to breathe. It’s out natural flight or fight reflex. Our muscles get ready and the adrenaline begins to flow charging us up to respond as the situation warrants.

And we forget to breathe.

So, take a breath in through your nose and let it out through your mouth. Now I am not saying suck air in like you just got through running a marathon or something. Just take a breath in and let it out. Slowly.

Then I want you to pause for a very brief 3 count. Onethousandone, onethousandtwo, onethousandthree. Say this count right now. Say it silently to yourself. Get a feel for the time it takes to say it. This does a number of things for you. It allows the oxygen you just brought in a chance to get to your brain and start the brain engagement process. And, you can flip your ears to the full forward position and begin the information gathering phase.

Now it’s time to listen and observe. If this is taking place in person, focus on what the customer is saying and doing. Body language is just as important as the words. Listen for emotions. Most importantly listen for the facts. If you are on the phone, sit up straight and concentrate on the caller. Pay attention to their emotions and write down important facts. The facts are critical to you shifting the conversation from the emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action stateme

begins to flow charging us up to respond as the situation warrants.

And we forget to breathe.

So, take a breath in through your nose and let it out through your mouth. Now I am not saying suck air in like you just got through running a marathon or something. Just take a breath in and let it out. Slowly.

Then I want you to pause for a very brief 3 count. Onethousandone, onethousandtwo, onethousandthree. Say this count right now. Say it silently to yourself. Get a feel for the time it takes to say it. This does a number of things for you. It allows the oxygen you just brought in a chance to get to your brain and start the brain engagement process. And, you can flip your ears to the full forward position and begin the information gathering phase.

Now it’s time to listen and observe. If this is taking place in person, focus on what the customer is saying and doing. Body language is just as important as the words. Listen for emotions. Most importantly listen for the facts. If you are on the phone, sit up straight and concentrate on the caller. Pay attention to their emotions and write down important facts. The facts are critical to you shifting the conversation from the emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action statem

o, onethousandthree. Say this count right now. Say it silently to yourself. Get a feel for the time it takes to say it. This does a number of things for you. It allows the oxygen you just brought in a chance to get to your brain and start the brain engagement process. And, you can flip your ears to the full forward position and begin the information gathering phase.

Now it’s time to listen and observe. If this is taking place in person, focus on what the customer is saying and doing. Body language is just as important as the words. Listen for emotions. Most importantly listen for the facts. If you are on the phone, sit up straight and concentrate on the caller. Pay attention to their emotions and write down important facts. The facts are critical to you shifting the conversation from the emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action statem

d observe. If this is taking place in person, focus on what the customer is saying and doing. Body language is just as important as the words. Listen for emotions. Most importantly listen for the facts. If you are on the phone, sit up straight and concentrate on the caller. Pay attention to their emotions and write down important facts. The facts are critical to you shifting the conversation from the emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action statem

he emotional state of what happened to the circumstances of what happened.

Who, what, when, where, why and how. This is where you are going to solve the problem or, as I like to say, make the most of the opportunity! Once you have listened to all of the information, and allowed the customer to finish completely, then it’s time to formulate an acknowledgment with a choice loaded action statement based on the facts. Sounds complicated? It’s not. It might sound something like this. First, take a breath. Pause, and then start.

“Mr. Customer, I can see you are upset that we have disappointed you and quite frankly if I were in your shoes I would feel the same way. Let me describe some options I can provide and see if we can come up with a solution. I can process a new order for you today and pay for the shipping and handling or I can track down the last shipment and see where it is and determine if it would be better to order new. And I will credit you shipping and handling on your next order. Which would work best for you?”

The point is to use basic skills, give choices and let them know you care. And you demonstrate a caring attitude by listening to them completely. Emotions and all.

Breathe, pause, listen, observe, acknowledge and formulate a choice loaded action statement.

It's easy to turn the heat down when you have the right attitude and tools.

But don't forget to breathe!